Visit My New Site: Tumblr

Blogger sucks (sorry Blogger, but it's true) so I've migrated fromshalimarwithlove to Tumblr.

http://fromshalimarwithlove.tumblr.com/

Bookmark it and go there now. Seriously.

Project 365: Day 102

Day 102, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

This place is off-the-chains. Cassell's in Koreatown is literally next door to my office. It's seriously an OG burger joint with freshly ground beef (made in AM), hand cut fries, and a buffet that includes canned peaches, cottage juice, and handmade mayonnaise.

Totally weird. Totally LA.

Project 365: Day 101

Day 101, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Happy 29th Birthday Sean! In theory, I should have taken a picture of the birthday boy, the massive amount of sangria consumed, or the competitive game of bocce ball. But I left my camera at home so this is the most interesting them I captured today; the promotion of the new X-Men Movie.

Project 365: Day 100

Day 100, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Shalimar's Secret Sangria

RECIPE INGREDIENTS

1 orange, cut into 1/8-inch slices

1 lemon

1 cup sugar

1 bottle dry white wine

1 bottle dry red wine

Sliced peaches, grapes, strawberries, or other seasonal fruit

Gin, grand marnier, or brandy to taste (optional) Put it all in a pitcher, let sit at least 4 hours, add ice. enjoy.

Project 365: Day 99

I should add this weekend to my list of LA "firsts". I went to Lightning In a Bottle, a SoCal festival filled with yoga, kombucha, dancing, dirty music, good vibes, and lots of patchouli. Think I'm joking? Check out these workshops:

• Hydroponic Gardening
• Discover the “art of being” (I still don't know what this was supposed to be about)
• Gift Circles and Gifting Economies
• Rite of Passage: The Natural Path to Leadership
• Resilient Community Organizing

After spending 2 days with the "Nail Crew", I headed back to the real world of Mob Wives, Oprah's final episode, and Candace's cooking.

Complete photo series after the jump....

LIB 2011, a set on Flickr.

Project 365: Day 98

Day 98, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Having a car fucking rocks! I'm on my way to some ranch in the middle of SoCal for Lightning in a Bottle. (Think of it like Burning Man with more yoga)Despite debating for months on whether I should I attend, I decided, thanks to Twitter, to go for it. A group invited me to share their campsite and show me the ropes.

Armed with my camera, water bottle, and ipod, this is going to be EPIC. Pics to come shortly.

Project 365: Day 97

Day 97, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Have you ever though to yourself, "I wonder what $80 worth of trail mix looks like? Well, your question has now been asnwered. Shira, aka "The Mule" loaded up her suitcase with 2 giant bags on trail mix, protein powder from Madison Market, and several back issues of the New Yorker.
Why the trail mix? Well, after visiting several  Whole Foods, I learned that not all trail mix is created equal, nor sold at all stores. This means my favorite Mt.Washington mix can only be purchased in SEA.

Attention future guests from SEA, I expect the same.

Project 365: Day 96

Day 96, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

It should come as no suprise to anyone that knows both Shira and I, that we are very different. Although after comparing notes, it seems we might be more similar than originally (apparently 3 years of "originally") thought. But still, it got me thinking is is possible for people that have different professions, different religions, or different eating habits last?

It’s typically incompatibilities than end a relationship. She’s a Mormon, you’re a man. He’s a banker, you just got back from Peace Corp. She went to Notre Dame, you went to BC/USC/Georgetown/Michigan/Stanford/Villanova. This is not a revolutionary concept.


Heavy hitters tend to be religion, level of intelligence, and cheating style, but a few recent conversations (slash nights) have made me wonder how the issue of compatibility plays out on the alcohol front. People are quick to say, “I could never be with a drug addict” or “stoners are a deal breaker”, but where is the fine (crooked?) line drawn on the issue of libations? Can you survive with someone whose drinking tendencies are dramatically different than yours?


From my research and experience here are the issues:


One drinks, one teetotals (doesn’t)
Second to screaming babies on an airplane, being around drunk people when you are sober is the most excruciating thing known to modern man. The most fun-loving, totally non-judgmental, stay-out-‘til-5am sober people are a delight, but are not drunk. They don’t make drunk decisions or have drunk appetites or want to make out in the middle of the dance floor. They, unlike their drunk worse-half, can see the people around them. This relationship is fantastic for the drinker who essentially has a free body guard who sleeps with them (unlike a bodyguard you pay for and then sleep with), but it makes sober sally a custodian (if you vomit)/lawyer (if you strip) and therapist (when you wake up guilt-ridden and poor). Also, why don’t they drink at all ever? There are 1-2 reasons that are legit and respectful and 2-4 that are giant red flags.




A binge drinker and a social drinker

Some people drink to enjoy a delicious beverage that happens to be alcoholic. Others drink to get drunk off whatever is available. Then there’s that selective set that drink and always get drunk because they don’t know how to stop enjoying a delicious beverage slash whatever is available. Parents and doctors call this set “binge drinkers”. I call them my friends.


Point being: there is a distinct difference between a drinker and someone who drinks. As it applies to a relationship, issues are as follows:

• One person costs way more than the other person when out
• One person remembers way more than the other person the next day
• Alcohol affects some people’s performance in the boudoir – so if you’re the drinker and the guy that’s dick (pun intended)
• People are judgmental about other people’s willpower. So you end up dealing with the whole, “I don’t understand what you can’t just enjoy 4 vodka sodas instead of 11” fight
• Binge drinkers deny that they binge drink (and generally hate people who are judgemental) "First of all, it was 9 not 11, and because I unlike some people, know how to have a good time."

Both just drink a ton
Logic would suggest this has the greatest likelihood of success considering the issue is compatibility, but there a bit of that old “if a tree falls” adage going on. If neither person is ever really sober in a relationship – is it actually happening?


Both are sober
Aww – that’s sweet, but then how did they have sex for the first time?




Old habits die hard and drinking habits die harder, so to adapt the advertiser’s credo: Drink as you will, but try to relate responsibly.

Project 365: Day 94

Day 94, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Between my visits to San Pedro and Gardena this morning/early afternoon, I spent a few minutes taking a gander at the city of my birth. Yes, although I claim to be a Bay Area girl (as does everyone in my family), it should be pointed out that I was born right here in LA County.
Speaking of born days and baby daddies something about this whole Arnold Schwarzenegger as baby-daddy ordeal struck me as strange.

No, it wasn't the fact that Arnold hid a love child from his wife of 25 years nor was it that the love child was the product of an affair with a member of his house staff. Sadly, I didn't find all of that particularly shocking.

What was strange in my admittedly desensitized look was this statement in the article from The LA Times.

"To protect their privacy, The Times is not publishing the former staffer's name nor that of her child."

I'm not sure how I feel about their omission of the staffer's name. I am all for protecting the privacy of others, especially young children, but in this case I'm not sure I think it's fair for someone to be protected when they were an equal participant in the "scandal" being reported.

I'll leave the issue of privacy protection to the experts, but this one question lead me to another: in a situation where a married man cheats with a woman who knows full-well that he is married, is one party guiltier than the other?

Yes, Arnold is the celebrity in this situation, but he did not act alone. He cheated on his wife with someone who worked in their home, but the "former staffer" had sex with her married employer. Is what he did worse? I don't know. But she is not innocent.

Let's assume he pursued her, worked hard to convince her, and made all the arrangements to have and hide the affair. Does that make him more guilty?

Is there a scenario in which her luring him, convincing him and insisting he hide all the evidence makes her more at fault?

I don't know the answer. I know people who have been involved in the situation and no matter how you slice it, it always feels like the person in the relationship is more in the wrong. Logically I know that's not correct.

This latest gossip really tests the question best. You've got a world famous actor-turned-politician with intense physical strength having an affair with a person he employs. It feels like he must be the villain, and lord knows we'll treat him that way. But is this unnamed former staffer at equal or less fault? And, back to the original question, what does the LA Times move to keep her identity a mystery mean relative to that bigger question?

Project 365: Day 93

Day 93, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

The Museum of Contemporary Art in Little Tokyo's current exhibition is Art in the Streets, the first major U.S. museum exhibition of the history of graffiti and street art. The exhibition traces the development of graffiti and street art from the 1970s to the global movement it has become today, concentrating on key cities where a unique visual language or attitude has evolved.

Art in the Streets showcases installations by 50 of the most dynamic artists from the graffiti and street art community, including Fab 5 Freddy (New York), Lee Quiñones (New York), Futura (New York), Margaret Kilgallen (San Francisco), Swoon (New York), Shepard Fairey (Los Angeles), Os Gemeos (São Paulo), and JR (Paris).

A special emphasis (and one of my favorite parts) is placed on photographers and filmmakers who documented graffiti and street art culture including Martha Cooper, Henry Chalfant, James Prigoff, Steve Grody, Gusmano Cesaretti, Estevan Oriol, Ed Templeton, Larry Clark, Terry Richardson, and Spike Jonze.

MOCA is a massive space and Art in the Streets features several shows within the show. There is a special section dedicated to the Fun Gallery, which connected New York graffiti artists with the downtown art community in the early 1980s. The Fun Gallery installation features the work of Keith Haring, Jean-Michel Basquiat, and the graffiti artists who shaped the gallery’s history. A section dedicated to the seminal film Wild Style (1983), co-curated by the film’s director Charlie Ahearn, will document its influence on the global dissemination of graffiti and hip-hop culture. A highlight of the exhibition was a Los Angeles version of Street Market, a re-creation of an urban street complete with overturned trucks by Todd James, Barry McGee, and Steve Powers.

There were several school groups (middle schoolers) taking in the exhibition, which was both great and a little disturbing. There are several graphic images of naked men and women and lots of photos of penis. I'm not sure I would like to be the parent chaperon having to tell kids to move along quickly. But still, kids taking in culture is pretty damn awesome.

Project 365: Day 92

Day 92, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Shira and I had a nice evening at my favorite Turkish place on the Westside eating GIANT platters of food (this picture is one of two), drinking tea, and enjoying a mint hookah. And we finally made it to Yogurtland! Oh yeah, we also did things that didnt involve food but I cant remember what.

 

Project 365: Day 91

Day 91, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Shira and I went over to the Annenberg for the opening day of their newest exhibition.

Beauty is different things to different people, different cultures and different time periods. The model Twiggy in the late 1970’s made the ultra-thin look beautiful; Peter Paul Rubens in 1600 helped to coin the term “Rubenesque” with his paintings of full figured women. While beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder, societal ideals and pressures certainly help to form our opinions of what is beautiful, and to that end the Annenberg Space for Photography is presenting a new exhibit to trace the culture of beauty. The aptly named “Beauty CULTure” exhibit is a photographic exploration of how feminine beauty is defined, challenged and revered in modern culture. Women have shouldered the burden of the beauty cult, spending billions of dollars every year in makeup, fashion and even plastic surgery—and as Annenberg says in their press release, “As much as beauty can astonish and inspire, it can also corrupt and subvert.”

project 365: day 90

day 90, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

After Executive Staff Meeting, I'm going to run down the halls shouting TGIF! Shira is in town and we've got places to see and things to eat. Yogurtland, The Counter, Homeboy Bakery, Gloria's, Sofra's... all my usualy hangouts. Shira said she wanted to see what my life is like and here it is, food and working out.

In other news, they still sell Four Loko in South Bay for those that need a quick pick-me-up. Arent these things illegal?

project 365: day 89

day 89, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

We went to Louisa's for lunch today because it's close to the office AND I had a groupon for a Yogurtland-esce place in Larchmount. I love that when I say to anyone that I ate at Louisa's they always say "ohh, the bread is so good". Forget about the food, which is also very good; the bread is where it's at.

Project 365: Day 88

Day 88, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

After I saw Chip Heath at NAYDO I knew I needed to read his book on business change theory ASAP. So I put it on my list and swore that as soon as I got my LA County Library card, I would reserve it (and probably wait 3 months until it came in). Well now I can put "Get a Library card" on the same list as "Get a CA Driver's License" thanks to my boss who gave me the book.

Shira flys in tonight, please pray for easy non-parallel parking.

Project 365: Day 87

Day 87, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

Guests in LA beware... I will drag you to Yogurtland. Wendy Bart is the second Seattle victim of my obesssion. Shira has been starving herself for our 6 day Yogurtland Marathon that will start on Thursday. I refuse to spend more than $3 at YL for the following reasons 1- I've decided that $2.81 is a proper serving  and 2- I usually have less than $3 cash in my wallet on any given day.

Remember cash? That green, waxy paper stuff that features one of several dead presidents or Ben Franklin?

Well, for upwards of eight years, I didn't. Never carried it. Never used it. Couldn't tell you which guy went with which dollar amount. My preferred currency was plastic and like most of us slaves to the magnetic strip, I swiped with reckless abandon.

Sure, I applied my version of mental checkbook balancing to each purchase, but come the end of the month my numbers never quite subtracted up.

I was in need of serious spending self-help -- a solution that would remind me of the value of the almighty dollar and stop me from swiping without thinking.

And so I went to the halls of self-improvement (the third floor of the Santa Monica Barnes and Noble) and sought out the advice of the fiercest financial contributor to any morning news program. A woman who would have made Mr. Potter feel like a spendthrift. A woman who lives and breathes efficiency from the tips of her toes to the top of her haircut. The one and only Suze Orman.

That was last week. I haven't followed her advice yet (cash only lifestyle) but my cash only lifestyle will begin June 1st. Who wants to join me?

Project 365: Day 86

Day 86, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

It's regional training time, which means I'll be spending the next two weeks in trainings/professional development opportunities. This also means I will snack. A lot. Today, I ate what one would think is an impossible amount of gold fish.
I've been on a indoor cycling (Spinning for all you non-Y folk) kick, steadily adding classes to my workout schedule until I reached my max of 6 classes in 7 days. This number includes the class I teach on Tuesdays at Culver Palms at 6am.
Now that I'm cranked my cardio up, I need to find some balance with strength training and yoga. So far, I've been attending 1 yoga class on Saturdays after my marathon 2 hour cycling session. Candace, this is where you come in. Maybe you should be my faux yoga instructor....

Project 365: Day 85

Day 85, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

It's so great to have a great digital camera in my hand. Seriously, all you need to do is point this thing at any subject and BAM, instant art. I tweeted some of the photos I took and I'm pleasantly surprised my the feedback and reactions. Maybe I should resume my photography hobby AND spend more time on twitter (positive reinforcement is AWESOME!)

I was against Twitter the first time I heard about it. It was year, maybe two years ago, and Alex and I were having one of our 10:00am catch-up breakfasts in which he lectures me about how to get more traffic for my original website (whitepeoplemusic.org RIP), I lecture him about how to properly date, and neither of us really listens. Joining Twitter was his reco of the day. Join as WhitePeopleMusic, he told me, and tweet snippets from your blog posts or other thoughts you have that are relevant to what you write.

It am not great at a lot of things (saving money, dressing up, expressing heartfelt affection without a follow-up joke) but I am terrible at a select few thing, and being an early adopter to new technology is one of them (the other ones are math, science, and disguising my reaction to things I find rude). So it wasn't so much that I didn't appreciate the idea of Twitter, it was more that I couldn't figure out how to use it. Yes, I now know that it's a Facebook wall with a 140 character limit, but at the time it was very overwhelming slash hard to read.

To say that Twitter is huge would be boring - it is, in the finally appropriate words of Rachel Zoe, "everything" - which is why I was surprised to hear Malcolm Gladwell - the man who first wrote about how something becomes so "everything" - come out so strongly against Twitter as a form of social change in his recent New Yorker article - Social Change: why the revolution will not be tweeted. (Yes, Shira, that shout out was for you)

I get his point - Twitter makes us lazy activists willing to throw 140 character support at any cause we have 30 seconds to re-tweet. Can Twitter really organize us, really move the social needle on anything from US policy reform to Iranian elections? I don't know. I've never thought about Twitter that way, and I'd venture to guess that neither have you.

Twitter is, above all, about self promotion. Whether your self is telling your 20 followers that the party you're at is bumpin' or that some comedian is hysterical or - more likely - that you're hysterical.

Can something so intentionally selfish ever motivate people in a new direction?

Twitter founder Biz Stone thinks so. He came out against Gladwell in a piece for The Atlantic. He points to all sorts of research proving the impact of Twitter - its use in charity fundraising, political organizing, and the like.

"Small Change" dismisses leaderless, self-organizing systems as viable agents of change. A flock of birds flying around an object in flight has no leader yet this beautiful, seemingly choreographed movement is the very embodiment of change. Rudimentary communication among individuals in real time allows many to move together as one--suddenly uniting everyone in a common goal. Lowering the barrier to activism doesn't weaken humanity, it brings us together and it makes us stronger."

I agree with both writers on the issue. Major social change the likes of the Civil Rights Movement will not be organized on Twitter, but at this point it will not go down without it.

So, what do you think?

Project 365: Day 84

Day 84, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

EPIC Weekend! Actually, let me edit that EPIC Saturday/early Sunday AM. At 10am, I get a call from C telling me to meet the crew at The Forum. In typically fashion, I don't ask questions, instead jump into the car and pay for $25 parking. Turn's out G got everyone tickets to see Prince as a surprise. And that was only the beginning.

After watching Janelle Monae channel both Prince and James Brown in what I must say has been her finest performance yet (at least out of the 3 I've seen). The purple-one himself appeared, opening with "Let's Go Crazy". He certainly didn’t skimp, playing for more than three hours. I'd forgotten the incredible catalog Prince has to draw on: "Purple Rain," "Uptown," "Controversy" and "When Doves Cry" were among the hits played.

Then, just when I thought my heart couldn't take anymore, STEVIE WONDER took center stage with Sheila E. and Prince to a funky rendition of "Superstition". Stevie jammed on harmonica and did lead vocals with Prince and Sheila backing him up til Stevie wanted to play and they lead him to the keyboards as Prince played bass.  Amazing.

But wait... there's more. Let me introduce my favorite, new-to-me, bartender in LA. What a great way to end an EPIC night. Everyone got home safe thanks to my awesome designated driver skills.

Question of the night, how many people can you fit in a Range Rover? Apparently, 7.

Project 365: Day 83

Day 83, originally uploaded by shalimargonzales.

This AM I drove to La Canada Flintridge to attend a training so I can start the process of becoming a certified cycling instructor. After this training, I have 3 more to attend before I can officially start teaching, which puts a wrench in Culver's plan to have me start teaching a 6am class on TUESDAY.

Does this picture remind anyone else of Super Mario Brothers? Amazed you can find land like this in LA County.